Saving My Sanity...

So it's been a little while since we've talked...sorry about that. I have to admit that the last week or two have been extremely trying for me. I forgot how hard it is to have a toddler around all day. My baby girl will be two at the end of this month and she has become quite a handful! I feel like she follows me around all day long trying to find as many ways as she can to drive me CRAZY! Many days it feels like she starts whining from the minute she wakes up in the morning to the minute she goes to bed at night. She has perfected an ear-splitting scream filled tantrum and shows it off multiple times a day. She has decided that if she does not get what she wants when she wants it she will let me know of her extreme dissatisfaction with me in no uncertain terms! Honestly, many days, I feel like I am two steps away from walking out that door and never coming back (or like throwing my own tantrum). I keep trying to tell myself that this too shall pass but when you're in the thick of it that doesn't seem to help much! I miss my sweet baby girl that was so peaceful and calm...

I do have to say though that my husband and two older kids are AMAZING! My kids see when I am at the end of my rope and come to my rescue by taking Em aside and playing with her. The other day Madison watched her the whole time we were at the park so that I could sit and chat with my sister. Thomas is so good at entertaining her too. He makes her laugh like nobody's business and he is her favorite jumping buddy on the trampoline (and believe me-she ALWAYS wants to be on the "Peen"). It is so sweet to see the love that they have for their baby sister...even though she drives them crazy sometimes too! Bless my dear sweet husband also. He comes home after long days at work and steps right in, sometimes with me in tears behind him, and gives Em his enthusiastic attention when I have no enthusiasm left. He picks up the whirlwind that has hit the house, throws in some laundry, does some dishes and doesn't complain when I ditch him to go for a Girls' Night. Honestly, right now I feel kind of useless. He does SO much to pick up everything that falls apart around me all day long.

I feel like I am empty. Like I have nothing left to give. Do you ever feel that way? I know this is a hard time. I know that this will pass and that I will miss this cute toddler stage, because yes, sometimes she is darn cute! But right now I am just trying to keep my head above water. I've noticed though that I feel better on the days that we get out and do something. If we stay home all day long I feel like I am going insane! The other day I took the kids to the mall (and left my camera in the car-darnit!) and we played at the Dinosaur Playland and rode the train and the carousel and had lunch and it was SO much fun! It was also like $60 after all was said and done. We've done lots of fun things this week (which I'll be posting about in the coming week) and it's really helped my overall mood but I've also spent too much money. I need to find much cheaper things to do that will get us out of the house and still entertain the kids. Any ideas?

Anyhoo, I guess it's probably better that I didn't post in the last week or so...in my frame of mind it wouldn't have been pretty! But I have some posts in the works now so come back and visit and I'll try to get back to updating more often.




P.S. I've decided to allow anonymous comments for those who don't have a google account so if you haven't been able to leave one before due to a lack of Gmail account, feel free to do it now...