Part 5...10-14 Days

*I'm sure by now you are all wondering when/if this story will ever end. I'm sorry if my blog has become a bit boring as I reminisce and I promise that I will finish up soon. If you are not really interested in the rest of the story I won't mind if you dump me until next week when my regular blogging will resume. Thank you for your patience...*

The next morning I was woken up by Em's NICU nurse shortly before my phone alarm was set to go off. She had an update for me. I could feel how swollen my eyes were from crying and lack of sleep and hoped that I didn't look as bad as I thought I might. The nurse explained that Em was doing well and that they had started her on the IV antibiotics she would need for the meningitis. She told me that she no longer had a fever and was in fact having a hard time keeping her own body temperature up so they were going to keep her under a warmer until she overcame that obstacle. They had also put her on just a little oxygen as her sats kept going down. They were going to be doing an EEG later in the day to look for signs of seizure activity and the Neurologist was going to be coming by that morning to evaluate her. She mentioned that one of the other nurses had mentioned around 7:00 that morning that they were surprised that I hadn't come to check on my baby yet and she had informed them that I had not gotten to bed until 5:30am and needed some sleep. Man I was grateful!

After she left I went into the bathroom to inspect my appearance and oh boy...scary! My eyes were so swollen and my skin was blotchy. My hair was a mess and if I am really honest, I really needed a shower! I went out to the room's fridge and pulled out a couple of cold juice cans and laid down with them on my eyes. I sat there for a while and then called Matt to let him know that we were in the NICU and that I needed some toiletries brought up before I could, in good conscience, face the outside world.

When Matt arrived I gave myself a sponge-bath of sorts in the bathroom, requested a couple of rubber bands from the receptionist which enabled me to make pigtails out of my disheveled hair (luckily I had also worn a hat the night before so that went back on too) and I brushed my teeth. It's amazing how just doing a few simple things makes a person feel a little more centered in a stressful situation.

When we were ready to go see Em we were instructed as to how to properly "scrub in" for the NICU and then we were taken back to her little heated crib still in the quarantine area. She was about the same as she had been when I had kissed her goodnight in the early morning hours and it was wonderful just to touch her little toes again. Shortly after we made it to her bedside the neurologist came in along with a social worker. The social worker sat down by me and informed me that she was there in case I needed to talk about the situation with her. She told me that she had been informed that I was having a really rough time with all that had happened and wanted to know why I felt I was having such a hard time with it. I told her that I was ok, just worried about my baby, and of course....I started to cry. What I really wanted to tell her was that of course I was having a "rough time"! I was worried about Em, I felt terrible about all she had been through and  I felt completely alone in the situation and to top it all off I was post-prego hormonal!

Anyhoo, the Neuro came in and examined Em and a very strange thing happened. Every time she would stroke the right side of Em's head her whole body would twitch. The Dr. said it wasn't normal but that she couldn't explain it. She said to go ahead with the EEG and that this new twitching could be from the meningitis as well because the infection could be irritating her nervous system making her extremely sensitive to touch. She told us that Em would be in the NICU for the next 10-14 days on antibiotics. What?! We thought they would give her a prescription and send us home later in the day. Matt questioned the Dr. again as to why she even needed to be there if her cultures had not grown out at all. The Neuro was rather condescending to Matt and essentially gave him an "I'm the doctor so don't question me..."  kind of answer which didn't make matters any better for Matt. The nurses all assured us that she wouldn't be going anywhere for a while and that I should go home and get some sleep. We left the hospital with Matt more frustrated than the night before and me walking away from my baby with more tears running down my cheeks.

Driving home was one of those experiences where you try your hardest to stay awake and wonder how you got there when you pull into the garage. When I got home I took a much needed shower and fell into a much needed sleep. When I woke up a few hours later it occurred to me that it was July 4th. The other two kids had been at my SIL's house (bless her!!!) since that morning and I knew that they would come home excited for fireworks. I knew that we would have our annual cul-de-sac 4th of July party and everyone would be eager to see the baby...who wouldn't be there. There would be questions and I would have to answer them, hopefully without crying, while all I wanted to do was show off my beautiful new baby. The night was better than I thought it would be and we actually didn't end up going back up to the hospital that day and just enjoyed the holiday festivities with the older two while knowing that our baby was in good hands. It was hard on Madison not having Em around since she was already completely in love with her and had waited so eagerly for her arrival. Obviously nothing had gone quite the way she had imagined it would since the minute her new sister had been born!

Oh and P.S. - How cute is my sweet daughter for highjacking my blog to tell me that she loves me?! I love you too sweetie!